Razor Blades.

For the life of me I can’t use an electric razor.  I’ve tried a few different brands, but none of them lived up to the promise of shaving as close as a blade.  For all the good they do me I might as well shave with a meat grinder.  So I’m a blade man.  The problem is ten blades cost almost as much as a car payment.   Why is that?  Are they that expensive to produce?  It doesn’t really matter- they’ve got me.  One of the best feelings in the world is a new razor blade.  I would spoil myself with a  brand-new razor blade everyday for the rest of my life if I were to ever win the lottery.  For me that would be the height of luxury.

I’ll probably never win the lottery and with uncertain times ahead of us I’m beginning to wonder what I’m going to do if I can’t afford new razor blades.  Jesus promised food and clothing, but said nothing about razor blades.  And as we all know He had a beard which means He’ll probably expect me to buck-up like a man- grow a beard like Him-  and then wait till the Democrats have figured out a way to provide free,  high-quality razor blades to every man, woman and child in the United States and Puerto Rico.  Democrat or Republican.  Citizen or not.

Problem is I’m terrible at waiting and my beard grown out looks simply awful. Awful.  I’m almost certain I’d endure the hard times we’re promised a whole lot better if I were clean shaven.  See, if I wasn’t irritable over the way I looked or pre-occupied with the way I looked I’d have more time for prayer.  To that end the other day I bought one of those blade sharpening devices you see advertised all the time.  The particular one I purchased promised 200 shaves from a single razor blade.  That’s a lot.

When will I ever learn?  Breaking with tradition I actually read the instructions before I tried out my new gizmo.  Just then I knew I’d been had.  First thing it said- something like...this device works best with NEW blades.  Do not try to sharpen a dull blade. Can you believe it?  That’s twenty dollars lost I could have spent stockpiling four blades for the impending economic disaster.  What a waste.

Meanwhile, I am thinking of other ways to cope if everything falls apart.  Amy has a little plot of ground in the backyard she uses for a garden.  So, we’ll have fresh vegetables. Then there’s the pool for water and heaven knows we have enough wild snakes in the backyard to keep us in meat for a long time.  And if it comes down to it Amy and I are prepared to eat the neighbor’s dogs if we have to.  However, it galls me to think as well-fed and watered I may be I’ll still have that ugly beard and a twenty dollar piece of junk.

Aren’t you glad our treasures are laid-up somewhere beyond the blue?


Opportunities everywhere.

I’m glad to be alive right now.  The negativity filling the airwaves and the sense of dread creeping at the hearts of millions around the world means believers will have many opportunities to display their true colors.  If our economy completely falters then perhaps a better climate will exist for folks to talk about the things that really matter.  Hard times usually cause people to ask the sorts of questions that can point them to Calvary.

Would I wish these hard times on us?  No. But the president-elect said times are about  to get harder.   Am I happy that millions of my co-citizens may lose their jobs?  Of course not.  But they may.  Does it thrill me  to hear other nations rejoicing that the sun may finally be setting on America’s prestige and place as a world leader?  No.  But what if they are right?  So be it my friends.

IF things turn out as badly as “they” say Christians are going to be swimming in opportunities to proclaim their faith.  If an oppressive gloom darkens the lives of those around us let’s be certain the light in our lives burns brightly.  Let’s be ready.

I’m of the opinion that churches everywhere should be preparing their people for the road ahead.  Let’s remind each other of the stories of old.  Manna from heaven, water in the desert, a container of oil that never runs out- our great God can do anything!  Let’s remind each other our Lord promised us I will be with you always, even to the end of the age. Isn’t that comforting?   How about rediscovering together this secret:  I know both how to have a little, and I know how to have a lot.  In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being content…

Won’t it be so cool to say to the hurting, “May we help you?”  Won’t it be great to have a song on our lips to dispel the darkness?  Won’t it be wonderful to live lives that are clearly baffling to friends and co-workers (if you still have a job)?  Won’t it be an honor to show our joyful allegiance to Jesus when that allegiance will actually cost us something?

Let’s be ready- together-  for the opportunities that will be everywhere.  I need you in my life.  To remind me of everything I believe.  To tell me to stop whining and to start praying.  I need you to remind me that God can from a minus make a plus.

Both political parties are wrong- the church, not the United States, is the last great hope for mankind.  Let’s be ready.  Together.